After having moved out of the place where I’ve lived my entire life until now, and having spent some time at what is now my new home, I’ve finally come to realize that this is actually quite a big step for me. In the beginning it was (and it still is) just fun to be able to live by myself and take more responsibility for my own life. However, I’m now beginning to realize that it’s more than just that, it’s a new way of life.

At this point, I’m starting to buy household things for myself, thinking about which of the items from my childhood I want to keep, and that also brings about some emotional changes. I’m starting to feel all grown up, and all these little decisions, like which laundry detergent to use or what to do in the holidays, seem to add up to something larger. It’s like the values and opinions I’ve been thinking about for a long time suddenly start to materialize in a whole new way, which is both scary and great at the same time.

I’m also starting to realize that my image of how adults face life has been slightly distorted. When I was smaller, I always thought that at some point in life you become more or less omniscient, and you suddenly know how to do almost everything. As I became older and this didn’t happen, I started to realize that all the people in the world, even the ones who do very important and difficult things, are in a way just like me. They make difficult decisions every day, based on their beliefs and experiences, and they also have moments where they feel like they don’t have control. This also makes me more aware of how the choices I make now and in the future are really important, because they are what will decide how my life is to become.

Like most of us, I’m unsure about what my future will bring, and I can’t help but worry about it sometimes. However, I’m becoming more and more certain that as I keep on experiencing new things and learning from them, I will be able to make choices that I can live with. I’m not perfect or all-knowing, but for me the important thing is to be able to make decisions and stand by them, so that no matter what happens, I know that this is my life, and I’ve got to make the best of it.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 5th, 2007 at 5:49 pm and is filed under My life, Thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.